D disliked starting each day. She'd rather
squander her time writing of dusty dreams
late at night by candlelight. This bothered
F who loathed the part where father must wake
unwilling daughter firmly from slumber.
Her eyes remain sleep-stained until M rakes
a warm washrag across her face. Brother
e, now a teenager who refuses
to capitalize his name, walks sister
to the bus-stop where B drives them to school
with a frown on his face. J, K, and L
form her usual clique. They chat until rules
force them to part ways when they'd rather stay
and gossip about H--though, i don't know
what they see in him. G drones on today
about grammar (they still teach that?) until
even the bell is exasperated
and offers to sound in pity and fill
the halls with familiar hullabaloo.
On the way to her next class, D spots O,
her friend whose affinity for junk food
has left her with contours that even eggs
must envy. They walk to Mr. A's class
where algebra awaits and students beg
for a reprieve to no avail. D sits
by Q who likes math after a quirky
fashion (and likes D more but won't admit
it). O passes D a note from across
the room that depicts A as a hog-beast.
They're busted when D overzealously
giggles. Mr. A remains unamused,
probably because the joke has nothing
at all to do with math. Lunch! D assumed
she would sit with J, K, and L; but boys
S, T, and U have monopolized their
attentions. She sighs and quietly joins
the lunch line behind X and Z. The pair
disagree as to who was first, but I
settles it by skipping past them both, fair
and impartially. Y serves sloppy scoops
filled with foods of dubious origins.
D looks disgusted and barely recoups,
her skin a green avocadoes would die
for. She gives up on lunch and hopes nurse N
will take pity on her condition. "Lies,"
says N who clearly wasn't born yesterday.
D dutifully doodles through science
and history, wishing the day away
as any dedicated student would.
P and R were unimpressed with her day-
dreaming in their classes (which they think should
captivate any child's attention for
the duration) and plan to hold parent-
teacher conferences. D heads for the door
as soon as she can and watches reruns
of The C Show on television until
F and M (physically) force her to turn
it off. She locks her room and she pretends
she were more like voluptuous V with
a glamorous job. She writes and suspends
the night with unfair tales of how W M
could be and jots down her ideas, too new
to replace her previous dusty dreams.













Devious Comments
--
(*that means you)
A full critique is always welcome. I'd be interested to hear your thoughts.
My fave bit: D looks disgusted and barely recoups,/her skin a green avocadoes would die/for."
:-D
--
it's not mess; it's curiosity
I think that giving letters instead of names to each character is a wonderful device... and it takes away the personalities that we associate with certain namesm so that the reader focuses more on what is said and done than their preconceptions.
Anyway... cool.
--
Name the color [link]
--
"Ships are safe in harbor - but that is not what ships are for." ~anonymous
poetzhaven
Hero
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